Value: Let Go the Ego - March 2025

First Week: Detect and reduce strong identifications & possessiveness

The essence of the ego is identification. It starts with the belief, "I am the body," and expands to include the senses, mind, and intellect. This identification further extends to everything that one perceives as "own," encompassing opinions, beliefs, faith, family, traditions, culture, and even objects as well as other people.

For example, when someone disagrees with something you consider as your "own," the ego reacts defensively, much like a venomous serpent raising its hood and hissing in retaliation.

Create a list of all that you consider as 'yours' and reflect on how much it affects your thoughts and emotions.

No one truly enjoys someone else's ego. Interestingly, we often fail to recognize our own egotistical behavior. To change this, we need to put in the effort to reflect on ourselves.

List those that you feel possessive about and observe how your thoughts revolve around them throughout your day. Consider how these attachments influence your emotions, feelings, priorities, and habits.

Don't confuse possessiveness with love; possessiveness is actually a form of attachment. Many painful experiences stem from these attachments. While love offers freedom, possessiveness seeks to control.

Work on reducing the tendency to compel others to behave or act according to your wishes.

Each one of us is born independently. According to most Eastern religious teachings, our birth is meant to fulfill our karma. Your own children may rely on you until they develop their individuality. Once they become more self-assured, their unique perspectives and approaches to life will emerge.

As a parent, it is essential to guide the next generation by educating them and instilling the right samskaras (values) to help them thrive. However, you cannot force them to behave according to your wishes; their karma will ultimately shape their lives beyond your control.

Your influence will be even less with those who are not closely related to you. As a leader of a group, department, or institution, your role is to provide vision, direction, and inspiration so that everyone understands their tasks and can work toward achieving them.

Make a list of things you feel you cannot live without, and consciously spend some quiet time without thinking about them.

We are often possessive not only about our Body, Mind, and Intellect but also the objects that we have. These attachments can dictate our happiness, allowing inanimate objects to control our minds. 

Taking a break from these possessions for a little while each day can help us diminish the ego's strong sense of identification. For instance, consider giving yourself a holiday from your iPad, TV, coffee or tea, sweets, and texting—one each day. 

Replace these habits or addictions with healthier alternatives, and observe how your feelings change as a result.

March Week 1 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

If someone speaks rudely or ill about someone in our family, and we feel hurt and angry, how is that ego? It seems to be a normal response to misconduct. How are we to respond instead to hurtful words or comments or false accusations?

• Ego is tied to identification. If a particular family member isn't truly someone you consider family, or if it's someone you don't like, you won't be affected in the same way by their actions or words. The phrase "my family" is an identification that affects our reactions. However, it's important to recognize that any rude comment or criticism should be objected to, even if it pertains to a stranger.
• As a seeker on a spiritual path (sadhaka), you should engage with the person and try to understand the reasons behind their dislike. Reflect on whether there is any truth in their words. Your practice (sadhana) involves rising above mere reactions and transforming them into thoughtful responses. Start by viewing the situation as an isolated event, without any preconceived notions or biases about the individual. 
• If this person's behavior is consistently negative toward many others as well, it’s likely a situation you cannot resolve. In such cases, it’s best to let them be and instead pray for their well-being.

Should I refrain from actively participating in WA conversations with schoolmates, after repeated inappropriate and condescending comments on our culture, and religion with respect to recent events (Ayodhya, Tirupathi Prasad contamination, MahaKumbh )? This is even after correcting the misinformation, and justifying the significance of these events.

• If the participation only adds more agitation to your mind, leave the group. Please understand that we are here to correct our own mistakes which elevate us to gain inner peace and tranquility. Correct their understanding with appropriate information and let go. 

 Value: Non-violence - February 2025

Fourth Week: Do mindful actions and practice tolerance.

Before beginning any action, mentally chant a prayer to offer all actions to God

We do actions at various levels and all of them are prompted by our own inherent tendencies.

• Vasanas are the root of all actions and are countless in nature. Internally, they generate desires, while externally, they attract situations that align with those desires. 
• The expression of vasanas in our intellect (buddhi) manifests as modifications of thought, also known as 'temperament.' Sankhyan philosophers refer to these temperaments as gunas. 
• These temperaments are conveyed as emotions or feelings in the mind, typically as reactions to various situations. We often recognize vasanas at this level of expression. 
• Our reactions are expressed through sensory activities, leading to either engagement or withdrawal based on our desired outcomes. These actions serve as a means of experiencing life. 
• The physical body, which houses our senses, is the vessel for these experiences. 

Understanding that our daily actions are driven by our tendencies, we should begin our actions with a prayer of submission to God. Taking ownership of the results of our actions reinforces our vasanas, while surrendering them to Him can weaken their grip on us. 
Adi Shankaracharya explains the word 'Narayana' as "नराणां समूहः नारः तस्य अयनमेव नारायणः" – meaning the abode of all humans. Therefore, offering to Narayana equates to offering to all people in the world.

Every night pray to God for forgiveness:  

Do not go to bed feeling remorse, regret, or guilt. Not all problems can be solved by ourselves. Some will resolve with time, while others will be addressed by God.

 

If you recognize that you are the cause of a problem, admit it and ask for forgiveness from God. Even if you don’t see yourself as the cause, at the end of the day, leave everything to Him to handle unsolvable issues. After all, He created you to live in His creation, and He alone will show you the way to navigate life.

 

It will not go unpunished when we habitually or unknowingly do wrong to others. The same applies to those actions which we fail to do, which we must. This isn’t because God is cruel; rather, it reflects the impersonal nature of the law of karma. The way to lessen the consequences is by seeking forgiveness from Him. If the President of a country can forgive and overrule, why not God?

Renounce thoughts of intolerance related to religious traditions, faith, and beliefs.

Every religious tradition had its visionary, someone followed by many who served as a manifestation of God's guidance for people in a specific region and culture. While we may not fully understand the circumstances that shaped a particular belief system, if it helped people to become noble, ethical, and devoted to God, it deserves respect.

 

Just as the laws and regulations of one country differ from those in another, so too do the faiths and traditions of different cultures. Intolerance is a sign of immaturity; it can be compared to a child who cries at the sight of a syringe, mistakenly believing that the doctor is there only to inflict pain. Similarly, only fanatical and ignorant individuals react negatively to faiths that differ from their own.

By embracing, we expand our understanding and we emulate the qualities of compassion and love of God with which He has been maintaining His creation.

This is the temple entrance of Jagadeeshwara Temple at Sandeepany Sadhanalaya in Mumbai - the Chinmaya Mission Monastery. It has the Buddhist traditional entrance archway, with dances of Shiva carved in its pillars and Urdu inscription at the top!

February Week 4 Guidance Audio:  

 

Value: Non-violence - February 2025

Third Week: Show compassion and reverence

Replace vengeful thoughts with compassion by praying for their welfare

Why do we feel restless when experiencing negative emotions like anger or jealousy? It happens because we distance ourselves from our true Self when we strongly identify with these feelings. In contrast, when we are in love or expressing compassion, we find ourselves in harmony with our peaceful Self. 

If you seek peace in your life, consciously work on replacing negative emotions with positive values. Come closer to your own peaceful Self. Be patient and allow yourself enough time to practice this.

Every living being has God's presence. Respect everyone irrespective of age and maturity.

As human beings, we often consider ourselves the most intelligent creatures. However, a closer and more impartial observation reveals that every living being is created with intelligence by a higher power. All life forms, including plants, manage to meet their needs without relying on direct support from other species.

 In contrast, we humans depend on the entire ecosystem to satisfy our endless greed and desire for sensory pleasures. This reliance often leads us to harm other living beings to fulfill our demands. 

The principle of non-violence should extend to respecting every living creature. Sage Patanjali, in his Yoga Sutras, points out that in the presence of those who practice non-violence, even creatures that are traditionally regarded as enemies discard their enmity.

    अहिंसा प्रतिष्ठायां तत्सन्निधौ वैरत्यागः (सर्वप्राणिनां भवति) || 2.35 

Every object is God's creation. Consciously do not misuse or abuse anything.

No human can claim to be the creator of the world. Even objects that seem inert are creations of God. Just as we value all living things, we should also appreciate those that are inanimate.

 

When you hold a mango in your hand, you can visibly see its water and earth elements. It also contains the element of air in the form of energy prana, and fire, since it is digestible. Additionally, it occupies space.

 

Although these five elements are considered inert, when combined, they allow the mango to sustain your life. This principle applies to all things in the world. God has not created anything that is useless.  Everything is important to someone, somewhere at some time. Therefore, show your reverence for Him by protecting His creations with love and respect.

February Week 3 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

If I were to practice non-violence, What do I do with the rats, mosquitoes, cockroaches, etc., which roam about in my house?  

• If they intrude on your daily life, you need to remove them not necessarily kill them. But if the situation is serious, take serious action against them. A gardener may kill the weeds in your backyard when they affect the health of the other plants. 
• In human society, it is necessary to punish criminals for their interference in others' lives. It is unsafe to let them go unpunished.  This is not violence, it is prudence.

How can we practice ahimsa in our thoughts, beyond just avoiding harsh words or actions?

• Words and actions are expressions of thoughts. Only when we start to closely identify with the mind of the creator who created everything out of love, we will not hurt anyone even in our thoughts.

If simplicity is about reducing unnecessary complexity, how can we apply it to our decision-making process in daily life?

• Decisions are made based on the priorities. That which is important in your daily life needs no discussion. Do you discuss if you should eat breakfast or not? Where there is choice, there is a need for discussions and decision-making. Decide first on what needs immediate attention and action, and then move on to the next.

What is the connection between ahimsa and self-discipline? Can avoiding harm to oneself (e.g., overcommitting, burnout) also be considered a form of ahimsa?

• Ahimsa itself is a self-discipline. Our animal tendency is usually reactive. To act, one should pause, think, and respond. And in that thinking, one must make sure that the action is not harmful to oneself and others.

How can we distinguish between essential responsibilities and self-imposed obligations that complicate our lives?

• Responsibilities are usually what you are expected to fulfill. When you become a householder through marriage, you have assumed the responsibility of taking care of your spouse and children. 
• Self-imposed obligations are based on what you give importance. If you want to excel in your workplace or you feel that your child should excel in whatever he or she does, it is self-imposed. 

If every living being has God's presence and deserves respect, regardless of age or maturity, how do we reconcile the consumption of animal products with this belief? Does taking the life of animals or using their products align with the principle of universal respect, or is there a way to justify it within spiritual, ethical, or practical considerations?

• Being more sensitive (not sentimental) is natural for a spiritually evolving person. When you know that the product is obtained by harming animals, and if you are sensitive to that fact, avoid it. Some justify that the animals are not harmed though the material to make the product is obtained from them (after they die).

How do we handle becoming overwhelmed by life or samsara while practicing the Sadhanas cumulatively?

• Nothing changes overnight on this journey; it requires maturity to blossom, much like a bud that transforms into a flower. Clarity of understanding, which comes from regular contemplation, will reveal the illusory nature of samsara. Once we recognize this illusion, the reality of worldly ways will appear weak and fragile.

⁠If, while practicing Sadhana, we feel ourselves straying from the Path, what are some ways to correct ourselves/bring ourselves back?

• Believe in yourself. The deviation may occur due to strong impressions (vasanas) accumulated over many lifetimes. Keep specific affirmation statements near your bed, on your workspace, and even in your car. Examples include: "I am Awareness, not just a bundle of thoughts," "I am a witness to the mind, not a victim," and "My peace is my choice." I hope this helps.

In the practice of Ishwara Pranidhana, how does one balance enduring difficult circumstances with the need for self-care and protecting one’s dignity?

• There is a famous saying: "God helps those who help themselves." When you slip and fall on the floor, you use the same floor to push yourself back up. In life, the world treats the wise and the ignorant the same. The wise learn from their mistakes, get up quickly, and strive to do better, while the ignorant tend to repeat their errors time and again. You should only surrender those problems to Him that you cannot resolve on your own.

 Value: Non-violence - February 2025

Second Week: Speak only words of kindness

Avoid the exchange of harsh words, and replace them with true words of concern.

Words you utter carry intent, emotion, and your opinion. Even those words that you send as text messages or emails will carry emotions for those who know you. For, most people when they read, they actually hear those words in your voice.

Much more is the effect of the words when you speak in person. Remember, the words that are unpleasant to your ears are equally unpleasant to others as well.  

Make your speech carry the emotion of concern and care. Even a smile accompanied by 'Hari Om' will make another person's heart happy. Perhaps he or she needed someone to acknowledge their presence!

Even when you are upset or angry, pause before you respond and think of replacing harsh words with appropriate words that will serve your intent. 

Begin the day with Universal Prayers such as the following:

Let all be happy, free of debilitation; let all see goodness, and let there be no victim of sorrow. Om peace, peace, peace. 

This prayer is universal because it transcends specific religions and is intended for all living beings. Each day should begin with a clear purpose, particularly the intention to avoid deliberately harming anyone.

Universal prayers serve two important purposes: first, they connect us to the powerful forces that govern the universe; second, they reach out to the deities that oversee both our inner and outer faculties.

Mentally repeat 'Shanti (peace)' three times at the end of your conversation.

In India, it is a tradition to end daily meals with sweets or mukhwas. Why is that? Even though eating is a routine activity, it should always conclude with a sense of contentment and joy.

 

This idea extends to our conversations with others, too. We often say “bye,” “see you,” or “have a nice day,” but do we truly mean it?

 

To show that we genuinely care about the other person, we should silently send a peaceful thought for their well-being. Even if there have been disagreements during the conversation, it’s important not to hold onto any grudges when we part ways. This practice is especially crucial for those we don’t meet often.

February Week 2 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

When people around me, whether relatives or colleagues are trying to cheat me or cause financial and emotional harm for their own reasons, it can be difficult to refrain from feeling vengeful. Although I try to hold back those feelings, I find it challenging to seek blessings for them. I also understand that the people in my life serve as instruments through which I experience my karma in this life. How can I find peace in this situation?

• Take one step at a time. Lord Krishna suggests endurance, equanimity and then forgiveness (तितिक्षा, समत्त्व, क्षमा). Endurance is not just holding back alone; it is the absence of instant reaction followed by substituting with appropriate action to express your concern about the situation. Do not remain passive.
• Equanimity is possible only when you do not feel victimized by the situation. Forgiveness is saintly which is the outcome of spiritual maturity.

 Value: Non-violence - February 2025

First Week: Cultivate inner purity

Watch your demeanor, to ensure it shows concern and confidence, not intimidating.

Our presence and appearance are the first things that others notice about us. It is essential to pay attention to our demeanor, even if our mental attitude is noble and well-meaning. A person whose presence is intimidating tends to be distanced by others. In contrast, someone who expresses concern and compassion is much more approachable.

 

Gurudev attracted devotees from various backgrounds. Whether it was a wealthy entrepreneur from Mumbai or a tribal woman from a Himalayan village, both were drawn to him. He addressed their individual needs with his compassionate demeanor.

While speaking and listening, look at the person by giving compassionate attention

In the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad, it is stated that a person's right eye symbolizes Brahman: "Dakṣiṇe'kṣan puruṣaḥ." Traditionally, the opening of the eyes of the deity during consecration is considered a sacred ritual, as the power of consciousness is fully expressed through the eyes.

 

The eyes convey more emotions than any other sense organ. In temple altars, the eyes of the deity are often intricately carved to express compassion towards the devotees. When speaking with someone, it is important to look into their eyes, but do so in a way that does not make them uncomfortable!

Realizing that the body is the temple of God, avoid both overfeeding and extensive fasting

Deho devaalaya proktah jeevo devah sanaatanah -The body is considered the abode of God, and the individual self is an eternal being. Just as we light a lamp at the altar, the food we consume sustains life within our bodies.

 

In the Bhagavad Gita, Sri Krishna advises Arjuna that the "yoga of meditation" is not suitable for those who either overeat or fast excessively, as both extremes are harmful to the body—the temple of God. 

 

Moderation in all activities is essential for non-violence. It is important to be productive and active, but not at the expense of your own health and the well-being of those who depend on you.

February Week 1 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

I understand that Ahimsa—in thought, speech, and action—is central to our sadhana. However, I have several friends who are non-vegetarians and still practice their religion. Does eating meat (which involves violence) align with dharma or sadhana? My parents are also meat eaters, and they say that I am running away from the world and that I will never find God.

• Religious practices, such as rituals, festivals, feasting, and fasting, do not necessarily emphasize values like humility and non-violence. Lord Krishna defines values as "knowledge" rather than merely rituals or religious activities. Therefore, those identifying with a particular religion may not necessarily uphold these values. Most religions, including Buddhism that preaches non-violence do not consider meat-eating as a religious violation.
• In my opinion, choosing not to eat meat is a personal choice. Some individuals avoid meat for health reasons, while others may be sensitive to the violence associated with killing sentient beings, which they view as emotionally mature, unlike plants.
• Those who are searching for God, may think that they will find Him while being violent toward other living beings. In the vision of Vedanta, God being present in all living beings, violence toward them is violence against God!

We have a person while talking, makes us feel intimidated. How do we look at him with compassion?

• Improvement takes time and may not happen all at once. Acknowledge that this behavior is a habit of the person and exercise patience. It's similar to tolerating a sick person who is coughing uncontrollably. Show sympathy and don’t feel intimidated. Gradually learn to express compassion, much like a doctor does with a patient.

Value: Simplicity - January 2025

Fourth Week: Both at home and workplace, delegate tasks that others can do. Simplify your personal needs. Do your tasks with a smile and help others.

Delegation is a delicate task for several reasons. Not everyone can handle every aspect of the work, and not everyone will approach tasks however you prefer. It is crucial to accept the imperfections that come with delegating tasks. 

Some people may complete the tasks differently but achieve results exceeding your expectations! It’s only by trying and being patient that you will come to realize this. This is so true when you give the tasks to the next generation!

Pay attention to your daily activities and note those that drain your energy and offer little contentment or fulfillment. This may include spending excessive time on mundane tasks or engaging in discussions with others that do not enhance any part of your life. 

Some individuals have an obsessive interest in certain mundane tasks. For example, they may clean the house 2-3 times every day as if someone comes to inspect it daily! Some brush their teeth every time they eat!

Observing and correcting certain habits is essential for creating time for quiet hours dedicated to contemplation and meditation.

Perform your daily activities cheerfully and willingly. I have seen Pujya Gurudev preparing for his evening talks with great enthusiasm, eager to meet his audience, and joyfully sharing his thoughts. He approached answering every mail with the same enthusiasm, offering thoughtful advice to seekers around the world.

Smiling itself is a service to others. Surprisingly, many want reasons to smile and more reasons to serve!

January Week 4 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

• My natural inclination is to be helpful, and I have been this way since childhood, even if it sometimes puts me at a disadvantage. Sometimes, I wonder if I should avoid helping in certain situations instead of lying, which makes me uncomfortable. Should I continue to help others because it promotes good karma?
• As a sadhaka, you should not extend help to get appreciated. The spirit of Karma Yoga is to help where necessary without expecting anything in return. When our actions do not bloat our ego, we are free from that karma.
• Recently, I've found it challenging to participate in social gatherings. My friends often feel that I'm out of sync with their interests, whether it’s related to clothing, decorations, or conversations. Will I end up alone because I’m trying to simplify my life and focus my energy on what truly matters, even if it means distancing myself from my former circle of friends? Additionally, do indulgence and hedonism naturally accompany spiritual practice?
• Know this for certain: you are always alone. Who is with your thoughts from morning till night? Ultimately, you are alone with your mind. While you may share your thoughts with others, the experience of those thoughts is uniquely yours. There's nothing wrong with spending time with friends, even if your interests differ. You might not participate in the same activities, but you can still engage in conversations about topics you both find interesting.
• If you are a first-generation immigrant, think about how you left your friends back home to pursue your professional career here. You will grow and mature on this journey by learning to redirect your thoughts and quiet your mind. In doing so, you will no longer feel bad about having distanced yourself from your circle of friends.

 Value: Simplicity - January 2025

Third Week: Reduce conversation time on cellphones and web browsing. Have daily phone-free hour(s). Stick to the important point while conversing. Avoid gossip!

Present-day communication tools such as mobile phones are highly effective for quickly conveying our thoughts and ideas. However, studies conducted by the National Institute of Health concluded that mobile device users may be at risk of hearing loss due to high ringtone volumes and loud listening habits. 

Additionally, extended web browsing can interfere with sleep patterns because of the blue light emitted by screens.

 

Despite these health risks, cell phones and computer monitors have become essential for children and adults to engage productively in their daily activities. Therefore, stay on the important points to convey and avoid lengthy discussions over the phone. Limit browsing time for personal pleasures.

Know that most unofficial phone calls are only requests for your attention, not emergencies! Mark a few hours of your daily life as phone-free hours. This will be effective by leaving the phone (and earbuds, too!) aside during that time in a room that is not very near you.

This week's practice will also focus on maintaining the discipline of speech as advised by Lord Krishna to Arjuna:

• Ensure that your words are true, not based on hearsay.
• Be mindful of how your words impact the listener, even if the words are true.
• Speak only about what is genuinely beneficial.
• Communicate with love and concern.

"Smart people speak from experience - smarter people from experience, don't speak!"

Here is a video explaining the practice for the third week:

January Week 3 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

• How do we communicate a harsh truth that someone needs to hear to motivate them to get up and do their duty/be a better person? 
• We have previously stated that negative motivation does not have lasting effects. It is more effective to encourage individuals to focus on positive personal growth. It is important to understand that significant growth cannot occur unless the person genuinely desires it.
• How do we practice beneficial speech when disciplining children?
• Discipline is essential for a disciple. Without proper respect for their parents, children will not follow like a disciple. External discipline tends to be short-lived. It is said, from age 6 to 15 the parents should instruct the children, and beyond 15 they should give only friendly advice.