Value: Non-violence - February 2025

Second Week: Speak only words of kindness

Avoid the exchange of harsh words, and replace them with true words of concern.

Words you utter carry intent, emotion, and your opinion. Even those words that you send as text messages or emails will carry emotions for those who know you. For, most people when they read, they actually hear those words in your voice.

Much more is the effect of the words when you speak in person. Remember, the words that are unpleasant to your ears are equally unpleasant to others as well.  

Make your speech carry the emotion of concern and care. Even a smile accompanied by 'Hari Om' will make another person's heart happy. Perhaps he or she needed someone to acknowledge their presence!

Even when you are upset or angry, pause before you respond and think of replacing harsh words with appropriate words that will serve your intent. 

Begin the day with Universal Prayers such as the following:

Let all be happy, free of debilitation; let all see goodness, and let there be no victim of sorrow. Om peace, peace, peace. 

This prayer is universal because it transcends specific religions and is intended for all living beings. Each day should begin with a clear purpose, particularly the intention to avoid deliberately harming anyone.

Universal prayers serve two important purposes: first, they connect us to the powerful forces that govern the universe; second, they reach out to the deities that oversee both our inner and outer faculties.

Mentally repeat 'Shanti (peace)' three times at the end of your conversation.

In India, it is a tradition to end daily meals with sweets or mukhwas. Why is that? Even though eating is a routine activity, it should always conclude with a sense of contentment and joy.

 

This idea extends to our conversations with others, too. We often say “bye,” “see you,” or “have a nice day,” but do we truly mean it?

 

To show that we genuinely care about the other person, we should silently send a peaceful thought for their well-being. Even if there have been disagreements during the conversation, it’s important not to hold onto any grudges when we part ways. This practice is especially crucial for those we don’t meet often.

February Week 2 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

When people around me, whether relatives or colleagues are trying to cheat me or cause financial and emotional harm for their own reasons, it can be difficult to refrain from feeling vengeful. Although I try to hold back those feelings, I find it challenging to seek blessings for them. I also understand that the people in my life serve as instruments through which I experience my karma in this life. How can I find peace in this situation?

• Take one step at a time. Lord Krishna suggests endurance, equanimity and then forgiveness (तितिक्षा, समत्त्व, क्षमा). Endurance is not just holding back alone; it is the absence of instant reaction followed by substituting with appropriate action to express your concern about the situation. Do not remain passive.
• Equanimity is possible only when you do not feel victimized by the situation. Forgiveness is saintly which is the outcome of spiritual maturity.

 Value: Non-violence - February 2025

First Week: Cultivate inner purity

Watch your demeanor, to ensure it shows concern and confidence, not intimidating.

Our presence and appearance are the first things that others notice about us. It is essential to pay attention to our demeanor, even if our mental attitude is noble and well-meaning. A person whose presence is intimidating tends to be distanced by others. In contrast, someone who expresses concern and compassion is much more approachable.

 

Gurudev attracted devotees from various backgrounds. Whether it was a wealthy entrepreneur from Mumbai or a tribal woman from a Himalayan village, both were drawn to him. He addressed their individual needs with his compassionate demeanor.

While speaking and listening, look at the person by giving compassionate attention

In the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad, it is stated that a person's right eye symbolizes Brahman: "Dakṣiṇe'kṣan puruṣaḥ." Traditionally, the opening of the eyes of the deity during consecration is considered a sacred ritual, as the power of consciousness is fully expressed through the eyes.

 

The eyes convey more emotions than any other sense organ. In temple altars, the eyes of the deity are often intricately carved to express compassion towards the devotees. When speaking with someone, it is important to look into their eyes, but do so in a way that does not make them uncomfortable!

Realizing that the body is the temple of God, avoid both overfeeding and extensive fasting

Deho devaalaya proktah jeevo devah sanaatanah -The body is considered the abode of God, and the individual self is an eternal being. Just as we light a lamp at the altar, the food we consume sustains life within our bodies.

 

In the Bhagavad Gita, Sri Krishna advises Arjuna that the "yoga of meditation" is not suitable for those who either overeat or fast excessively, as both extremes are harmful to the body—the temple of God. 

 

Moderation in all activities is essential for non-violence. It is important to be productive and active, but not at the expense of your own health and the well-being of those who depend on you.

February Week 1 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

I understand that Ahimsa—in thought, speech, and action—is central to our sadhana. However, I have several friends who are non-vegetarians and still practice their religion. Does eating meat (which involves violence) align with dharma or sadhana? My parents are also meat eaters, and they say that I am running away from the world and that I will never find God.

• Religious practices, such as rituals, festivals, feasting, and fasting, do not necessarily emphasize values like humility and non-violence. Lord Krishna defines values as "knowledge" rather than merely rituals or religious activities. Therefore, those identifying with a particular religion may not necessarily uphold these values. Most religions, including Buddhism that preaches non-violence do not consider meat-eating as a religious violation.
• In my opinion, choosing not to eat meat is a personal choice. Some individuals avoid meat for health reasons, while others may be sensitive to the violence associated with killing sentient beings, which they view as emotionally mature, unlike plants.
• Those who are searching for God, may think that they will find Him while being violent toward other living beings. In the vision of Vedanta, God being present in all living beings, violence toward them is violence against God!

We have a person while talking, makes us feel intimidated. How do we look at him with compassion?

• Improvement takes time and may not happen all at once. Acknowledge that this behavior is a habit of the person and exercise patience. It's similar to tolerating a sick person who is coughing uncontrollably. Show sympathy and don’t feel intimidated. Gradually learn to express compassion, much like a doctor does with a patient.

Value: Simplicity - January 2025

Fourth Week: Both at home and workplace, delegate tasks that others can do. Simplify your personal needs. Do your tasks with a smile and help others.

Delegation is a delicate task for several reasons. Not everyone can handle every aspect of the work, and not everyone will approach tasks however you prefer. It is crucial to accept the imperfections that come with delegating tasks. 

Some people may complete the tasks differently but achieve results exceeding your expectations! It’s only by trying and being patient that you will come to realize this. This is so true when you give the tasks to the next generation!

Pay attention to your daily activities and note those that drain your energy and offer little contentment or fulfillment. This may include spending excessive time on mundane tasks or engaging in discussions with others that do not enhance any part of your life. 

Some individuals have an obsessive interest in certain mundane tasks. For example, they may clean the house 2-3 times every day as if someone comes to inspect it daily! Some brush their teeth every time they eat!

Observing and correcting certain habits is essential for creating time for quiet hours dedicated to contemplation and meditation.

Perform your daily activities cheerfully and willingly. I have seen Pujya Gurudev preparing for his evening talks with great enthusiasm, eager to meet his audience, and joyfully sharing his thoughts. He approached answering every mail with the same enthusiasm, offering thoughtful advice to seekers around the world.

Smiling itself is a service to others. Surprisingly, many want reasons to smile and more reasons to serve!

January Week 4 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

• My natural inclination is to be helpful, and I have been this way since childhood, even if it sometimes puts me at a disadvantage. Sometimes, I wonder if I should avoid helping in certain situations instead of lying, which makes me uncomfortable. Should I continue to help others because it promotes good karma?
• As a sadhaka, you should not extend help to get appreciated. The spirit of Karma Yoga is to help where necessary without expecting anything in return. When our actions do not bloat our ego, we are free from that karma.
• Recently, I've found it challenging to participate in social gatherings. My friends often feel that I'm out of sync with their interests, whether it’s related to clothing, decorations, or conversations. Will I end up alone because I’m trying to simplify my life and focus my energy on what truly matters, even if it means distancing myself from my former circle of friends? Additionally, do indulgence and hedonism naturally accompany spiritual practice?
• Know this for certain: you are always alone. Who is with your thoughts from morning till night? Ultimately, you are alone with your mind. While you may share your thoughts with others, the experience of those thoughts is uniquely yours. There's nothing wrong with spending time with friends, even if your interests differ. You might not participate in the same activities, but you can still engage in conversations about topics you both find interesting.
• If you are a first-generation immigrant, think about how you left your friends back home to pursue your professional career here. You will grow and mature on this journey by learning to redirect your thoughts and quiet your mind. In doing so, you will no longer feel bad about having distanced yourself from your circle of friends.

 Value: Simplicity - January 2025

Third Week: Reduce conversation time on cellphones and web browsing. Have daily phone-free hour(s). Stick to the important point while conversing. Avoid gossip!

Present-day communication tools such as mobile phones are highly effective for quickly conveying our thoughts and ideas. However, studies conducted by the National Institute of Health concluded that mobile device users may be at risk of hearing loss due to high ringtone volumes and loud listening habits. 

Additionally, extended web browsing can interfere with sleep patterns because of the blue light emitted by screens.

 

Despite these health risks, cell phones and computer monitors have become essential for children and adults to engage productively in their daily activities. Therefore, stay on the important points to convey and avoid lengthy discussions over the phone. Limit browsing time for personal pleasures.

Know that most unofficial phone calls are only requests for your attention, not emergencies! Mark a few hours of your daily life as phone-free hours. This will be effective by leaving the phone (and earbuds, too!) aside during that time in a room that is not very near you.

This week's practice will also focus on maintaining the discipline of speech as advised by Lord Krishna to Arjuna:

• Ensure that your words are true, not based on hearsay.
• Be mindful of how your words impact the listener, even if the words are true.
• Speak only about what is genuinely beneficial.
• Communicate with love and concern.

"Smart people speak from experience - smarter people from experience, don't speak!"

Here is a video explaining the practice for the third week:

January Week 3 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

• How do we communicate a harsh truth that someone needs to hear to motivate them to get up and do their duty/be a better person? 
• We have previously stated that negative motivation does not have lasting effects. It is more effective to encourage individuals to focus on positive personal growth. It is important to understand that significant growth cannot occur unless the person genuinely desires it.
• How do we practice beneficial speech when disciplining children?
• Discipline is essential for a disciple. Without proper respect for their parents, children will not follow like a disciple. External discipline tends to be short-lived. It is said, from age 6 to 15 the parents should instruct the children, and beyond 15 they should give only friendly advice.

 Value: Simplicity - January 2025

Second week: Avoid talking about yourself to others. Do not be too judgmental about your behavior. Improve, do not condemn

Bhagavan Adi Shankaracharya, while introducing the subject matter of the Bhagavad Gita, notes that all humans are consistently engaged in two pursuits: the pursuit of happiness (सुख-प्राप्ति) and the avoidance of suffering (दुःख-निवृत्ति). 

We tend to seek out what brings us joy and avoid what causes us unhappiness, whether these are objects, situations, people, or memories.

When we focus only on these two aspects, we often overlook the inherent joy or bliss within us. It’s akin to missing the all-pervading space that accommodates everything around us; we only recognize the space once all the objects in a room are removed. When we quiet our minds from the constant chatter of likes and dislikes, we can become aware of the silent presence of Pure Consciousness, which is inherently blissful. 

Both external and internal triggers contribute to our likes and dislikes. By refraining from discussing our strong preferences with others, we consciously reduce their influence on our minds. To make this practice more effective, avoiding external triggers, such as spending time with people who express strong opinions about political ideologies or religious fundamentalism is also important.

To enhance our awareness of personal areas of hatred, we should list those things that trigger feelings of anger, sorrow, frustration, and similar emotions. This exercise should be approached with caution to avoid bringing up unwanted memories. Additionally, we should decide not to speak about or dwell on these negative feelings.

We are all born with certain shortcomings that we need to work on. Instead of condemning ourselves, let's focus on overcoming these shortcomings with external help and healthy habits. Often, starting to learn a new skill or reorganizing our daily routine can help us break the habit of brooding over our own failures and setbacks. 

A religious fanatic went to a Master and said, 'Allow me to read from the teachings of my Guru.'
'I shall listen with pleasure,' said the Master.
He read a few sentences and looked up. The Master said, 'Whoever wrote those was truly enlightened one!'
Pleased, he read further. The Master commented, 'Those words are from one who must be radiant with divinity.'
Leaving the Master, when he met his Guru he reported, 'I got that man to admit that you are divine and enlightened.'
The Guru smiled and said, 'Did that do you any good except inflate your ego?'

January Week 2 Guidance Audio:  

 

Q & A

• It is often said, "squeaky wheel gets the grease."  We are expected to be more vocal in highlighting the contributions and value we bring to the workplace. The silent hard worker usually goes unnoticed and typically doesn't get an opportunity to participate. What should our advice to him be?
• In today's world, speaking about one's own accomplishments is necessary to get noticed and to get the opportunity to prove oneself through more challenging projects at the workplace. There is nothing wrong with this because you are speaking about facts, not fancies! But avoid unprompted conversations focusing only on you!
• How do we face people who may be very close to us, and who strongly criticize our actions, habits, and behavior?
• विद्यते न खलु कश्चिदुपायः सर्वलोक-परितोषकरो यः | सर्वथा स्वहितमाचरणीयं किं करिष्यति जनो बहुजल्पः ||
  There is no method by which anyone can make everyone happy. Always engage in personal upliftment. The world will only comment.  
• Vasanas determine our likes and dislikes, forming the basis of being judgmental about people’s habits, especially near and dear ones. How to overcome this tendency?
• Vasanas cannot be overcome without adopting a sattvic attitude. For example, prioritizing one's health can moderate a strong desire for food. Similarly, when you notice a particular habit in someone you care about, it is more effective to change your attitude and offer support to help them overcome it, rather than being judgmental.
• In a corporate setting, sharing feedback on shortcomings is essential. Many believe that negative motivation is more effective, and often it proves successful, leading to an acceptance of this approach.
• In your current approach, many often settle for immediate or instant results. We should consider whether this truly benefits personal growth or simply helps someone prove themselves in a challenging situation. Relying on negative motivation may not lead to positive growth in the long run.
• I just now had a conversation with a relative and he wanted to know what activities I am involved in and if it is helping me. And my response to him is all about 'me and what I gain out of it. What is the borderline in speaking about one's likes and dislikes?
• There is nothing wrong in speaking about what you do that has benefitted you, with others who can be helped by that. Avoid your strong opinions of likes and dislikes which are of no benefit to others.
• Regarding the likes and dislikes, should we list what triggers those feelings - and allow our acknowledgment to let them fade? Or should we be listing alternative 'healthier' ways of dealing with them? In either case, Ideally, we don't want to fan the flames of dying embers.
• If you can list alternative healthier ways to deal with them, please do. After all, reorganizing our lives with a healthier lifestyle alone can give us enough time to quiet the mind in meditation.
• How do we stop from condemning ourselves if we accidentally repeat a mistake?
• Does condemning yourself help you grow, or does it lead to regret and depression? Self-improvement is slow but steady; you cannot expect overnight change. Many of our inherent tendencies can only be overcome through self-observation and self-correction. There are no shortcuts to personal growth.
• How can I simplify my mental energy when friends neglect email or WhatsApp etiquette? I always try to acknowledge messages and calls because I believe it’s respectful, but many people around me are more casual and don't respond. Am I overcomplicating things by focusing on myself? How can I reduce the mental chatter and stop judging myself and others?
• We always look at the world from our own standpoint. Our priorities need not be everyone's priorities. We must recognize that everyone's life is filled with both predictable and unpredictable situations. Admitted that some may be casual in treating your messages. Remaining silent does not mean rejection. 
• I was doing something to be recognized & I told my mind I shouldn’t be doing it, am I still creating an entry into the paap punya log?  when I think about my self-corrections, how can I stop boosting my ego about MY ability to correct myself? 
• Any action marked by ego will leave a lasting impression on your psyche. Spiritual practice must focus on eliminating all assertions of the ego, especially in your pursuits of spiritual growth.
• In my personal life, I have a hard time confronting others. So I try to let others know how I feel about their behavior with gestures, signals, or sometimes verbally. But if a person still either ignores me or doesn’t understand, then I end up getting angry with them.  In this process lot of time, I make people go against me or lose respect for me.  It is hard for me to forgive or not criticize someone when I am upset with them as I had informed them about my view/ feelings in the past. I have a very hard time to forgive and forget.
• A sadhaka should primarily focus on personal growth, allowing the world to take care of itself if one seeks freedom. This focus is not selfish. Gurudev often said, "When you change, the world around you will also change." Do not give anyone around you control over your mind.

PRACTICE:

Are we aware …

- am I cutting conversations to share my viewpoint?

- ⁠am I a patient listener? 

- ⁠am I giving full attention/focus to others while listening?

- ⁠are my internal thoughts and conversations with myself focused on “I”?

- ⁠in observing ourselves, are we becoming judgmental about others?

 Value: Simplicity - January 2025

First week: Do not pretend. Be who you are. Do not be artificial.

Pre-tension is a prelude to tension. One of the key factors that cause stress in our lives is the distance we maintain from our true selves. 

 

Our true self comprises straightforward qualities: Truth, Awareness, and Bliss. Truth is simple, while untruth is complicated. To understand truth, you don’t need to remember anything; however, when it comes to untruth, you must remember what to say, whom to tell it to, how to say it, and when to say it.

 

Awareness is pure perception free from interference by the mind. For instance, simply observing a flower as a flower exemplifies Awareness. Any additional thoughts about the flower pull us away from true Awareness.

 

Bliss, or eternal happiness, is our inherent nature. No one consciously seeks sorrow or transient happiness. 

 

Being true to ourselves is fundamentally simple. By not embracing this simplicity, we complicate our lives. We often become artificial in our behavior, appearance, demeanor, and speech, seeking appreciation and recognition from those around us, believing that everyone is constantly noticing us.

 

“Start liking the person you see in the mirror without any makeup!”

 

From the perspective of Vedanta, pretension is Maya; it is merely an appearance, not the truth. As long as we cling to pretensions, we will continue to lack inner freedom, true joy, and peace.

What is pretension? A relevant video from Pujya Gurudev

VIDEO EXPLAINING THE PRACTICE 

Zen master to disciples: "I am simply selling water by sitting on the river bank."

January Week 1 Guidance Audio:  

 

FAQ:

• The second item “Don’t compromise on your values on your own”? Does that mean you can compromise your values when forced to?
• Not at all. It only means temporarily accommodate the interest of the members of your family who may not share the same value as yours. For example, you value time that should be spent on useful endeavors. Don't you accommodate your child's request for spending time in watching a cartoon movie?       
• ⁠Going back to point-1... how do you know who you are... you have been living a certain life all along and you might think that's what you are... how do you know that it is really you?
• This needs some background of spiritual knowledge. For a beginner, it is truly difficult.  For, he/she may have no clue about spiritual freedom or moksha or release from rebirth cycle. Basic study of books such as Self  Unfoldment will help.
• While I am not an optimal human being, how would it be fair for others around me when I am trying to be myself?
• Trying to be oneself does not mean alienating oneself. It's being steadfast in one's chosen values. Don't we have our own habits which we don't give up for others?
• First choose the spiritual values to yourself such as compassion, solitude, non-injury etc. Understand them in your own words and be passionate about one or more of them. Hold them dear to yourself just as you do with your pet habits. Consciously do not compromise. This is steadfastness.
• How can we avoid putting on some makeup? Is it not necessary when we go out to meet the world??
• Gurudev used to tell us to 'Be presentable.' When we present ourselves with well groomed hair and clean dress, we become presentable. This is necessary when you go to work or to meet people. Be moderate. Don't overdo it. This is not to impress the people.
• How does simplicity help me?
• You can become rich by increasing your income or by simply letting go the non-essentials. The first one needs extra time and effort and the second one, just simple attention. Choice is yours!
• Need some clarification about the third point of this week: “Do not own what others value as yours “
• Spiritual values such as compassion and forgiveness are eternal. We want others to practice these toward us! Some may think that these are too idealistic and impractical and adopt anger, intolerance, etc. to solve problems instantly.
• As a sadhaka, you have to consciously choose not to adopt them even if you notice that your near and dear ones value them. Eternal values do not give instant results, but they will leave lasting impressions on everyone.
•  It’s hard to stay true to yourself while accommodating others …
• In a family environment, it will be hard, no doubt. But make it possible whenever you can. Slowly the members of the family will understand the values you uphold. Be gentle in saying NO to those which you don't agree to participate in. If needed briefly explain the reason.